Out of Gas on Lover’s Leap: A play Grouper: You want the rest of my beer Myst (Grimaces) God no. Grouper Beer always makes my stomach feel better. Really. It’s better than Pepto Bismal. You don’t throw up or anything. Just roll it around in your mouth ‘till the cold is off, then let it slide down to your stomach. Try it- Myst (She does) Thanks. Grouper I love you. Myst Don’t say that for awhile, all right? Grouper That was our last fight Myst Grouper; it wasn’t our last and it wasn’t even one of our best. Grouper (Ignoring her) I’m going to get gas. Then we’re going to drive to Seaside. You can sleep in the back if you don’t feel good— Myst I feel better. I feel fine. (Jumps in back seat) How about one for the road? Grouper Come on, Myst. Myst It would relax us! Grouper I am relaxed! Why are you so nervous? Myst I’m not— Grouper It’s something! Myst (Getting progressively more upset) This is sort of a big commitment, isn’t it? Whether we get married or live together or even spend the summer together… Grouper We’re going to spend longer than that— Myst I’ve never made a commitment like this before to anybody. It’s not that easy to do— Grouper Myst, if the two of us can’t commit to each other, who else could we ever commit to? Myst There are so many things that could go wrong! Grouper (Screams.) I said you could fuck other guys, didn’t I? Myst That’s not it— Grouper Your mom can visit anytime she wants— Myst I know that— Grouper WHAT ELSE THEN? Myst We could have a hard time finding a place to live— Grouper We’ll find a place. Worse comes to worse, we’ll sleep on the beach— Myst (Almost whining.) But that would be so— Grouper WE’LL SLEEP IN THE CAR! Myst Maybe nobody will hire us. Singing or anything. Grouper Somebody will. Besides, I have money, you have money – everybody we know has money. Myst You spend so much with all the shit you use— Grouper TO PUT UP WITH YOU! (Pause.) We’ll make it. And I could cut down— Myst I don’t know if you’ll be able to do that… Grouper I swear, Myst. Trust me. Myst What if I get real out of control, who’s going to keep an eye on me? Grouper I will. Myst (More and more upset.) What if I’m sick? Grouper I’ll take you to a doctor. Myst What if I’m really sick? Are there good doctors there in wintertime? Grouper I’LL TAKE YOU TO A HOSPITAL! Myst What if I’m pregnant? (Pause.) What if I was? What would you do about that? Get an abortion, right? Christ, abortions are no big deal. My mother has had more than I can count. I’m the only thing that squeezed by— Grouper (Quietly.) Are you pregnant? Myst I said, “What if”— Grouper Myst— Myst I just wanted to see your reaction to it. I was making it up. Grouper You’re pregnant. Myst (Pause.) Yeah. (She looks at him and becomes angry.) I knew you’d react this way. Get all fucking hurt. I knew you’d make a big deal when it’s no big deal. Shit. Sooner or later the odds get you, right? Your God of Math turns the numbers on you— Grouper Who’s the father? Myst Thanks a lot, Grouper. Count on you, right? Trust you, right? First thing you ask is who it was. YOUR feelings. You’re some guy all right. Tell you what, you sit here in your car, and I’ll go down to the station and have them send up gas and Kleenex— Grouper We can have the baby— Myst WE’RE not going to have anything! It’s my baby! Fuck; I would have gone for a D & C this week except for graduation; there was so much to do with the packing and parties and everything. Even if I decided to have it I’d put it up for adoption; they’re dying for white babies now, aren’t they? They are. That’s how we can make some quick bucks, right Group? Sell it to the highest bidder: “How much for the grand kid of Snow Angeleeds.” Grouper If you keep the baby— Myst I’M NOT! (Pause.) Give me one good reason to keep it. Give me one good reason you’d want to see another baby in this world. What would you tell it, Grouper? What would you say is so wonderful about all this that it had to see? What’s so wonderful about me…or you. Grouper (Pause.) Then you’ll get the abortion. Myst I KNOW I’LL GET IT. (Pause.) It’s just going to be a little hard you know… (Begins to cry.) Grouper Myst—(Reaches to her.) Myst DON’T TOUCH ME! (Long Pause.) You hate me don’t you? Grouper No. Myst Hey; I’ll get over it. You can get over anything, right? Grouper I don’t know. Myst I’m going to France with my mom, Group. It will be just for awhile. Grouper (Pause.) Okay. Myst I’ll be back. You let me know where you are, all right? I’ll call you every day. Every day I can, anyhow. You go to Seaside, get a place, get a job, check a job, check out some of those bars, maybe— Grouper Yeah. I could do that. Myst This is so fucking inconvenient, you know? I mean, what a pain in the ass way to ruin a graduation. When I told my mom— Grouper She knows? Myst (Pause.) Yeah. She’s in the middle of recording that record with Roger, but she cam right out to the phone. She’s wrapping it up next week, it’s as soon as she could. She told me that a week or two wouldn’t matter, though. She said to relax, it’s no big deal. Grouper She said that? Myst Shit Grouper; she’s right. Half of the girls in our class have had abortions. I’m lucky it’s only my first. Grouper Myst. Let me help you. Let me do something for you. If I’m no good for you, I’m no good to anybody. Myst You are helping me. You’re helping by saying that. Grouper That’s not helping. That’s just talking. (Pause.) I’m not enough, am I? Myst I don’t know if anybody’s enough for anybody, Grouper. Some people think they are, for awhile, but sooner or later they’re on their own. Everybody’s on their own. Grouper I guess I was just being stupid. Myst No you weren’t. You were just dreaming. Grouper That’s what I mean. Myst I love you, Grouper. Grouper I love you too, Myst. (Pause.) That doesn’t sound like anything at all. (Sounds from below: the crackle of fireworks.) Myst What’s that? Grouper A skyrocket, I think. Didn’t Whorrie Laurie say she was going to have fireworks? Myst I think so. Hey; we have great seats for them, don’t we? This is the first time I looked down at fireworks. Grouper Sit up here. (They get on the hood.) Myst I guess the party’s almost over. Grouper It’s pretty late. (Pause.) Are you sorry you missed it? Myst Not at all. I had a wonderful night. Grouper (Pause.) Myst; do you think that if we were in love for years and years that… things would change? Myst What do you mean? Grouper Would I mean more to you? Would anything mean more? Myst I don’t know. I mean, you look at people… I guess it depends on how stupid you get when you get older, whether things look better of not. I don’t think things change. You can’t stop shit from happening from happening to you; you can’t stop thing hurting you. Grouper Yes you can, Myst. You can. (He stares at her; she meets his gaze, then looks away at the sound of another explosion.) Myst (Long Pause.) You really see from here, can’t you. Grouper Yeah. Myst Are you okay? Grouper Yeah. Just tired. Myst I guess we’d better call it a night. Grouper We could never had a better night, do you think, Myst? Myst (Meeting his stare.) No. I don’t think we ever could. (They kiss.) Happy graduation. Grouper Happy graduation. (He rises.) Let’s go. Give me your hand. Myst Can you see? Grouper Yeah. Trust me. Myst Grouper, are you going to miss Seaside? Grouper It could never be as good as I wanted it to be. How about France? Myst I’ve been there, No big deal. Grouper No? Myst No. (Myst puts up her hand; Grouper pulls her to his side.) I love you Chauncey Morris. Grouper I love you, Missy Angeleeds. (Pause.) On three. Ready? Myst Ready. Grouper One— Myst Two—(Clutching hands, they fly into the air.)
Grouper:
You want the rest of my beer
Myst
(Grimaces) God no.
Grouper
Beer always makes my stomach feel better. Really. It’s better than Pepto Bismal. You don’t throw up or anything. Just roll it around in your mouth ‘till the cold is off, then let it slide down to your stomach. Try it-
Myst
(She does) Thanks.
Grouper
I love you.
Myst
Don’t say that for awhile, all right?
Grouper
That was our last fight
Myst
Grouper; it wasn’t our last and it wasn’t even one of our best.
Grouper
(Ignoring her) I’m going to get gas. Then we’re going to drive to Seaside. You can sleep in the back if you don’t feel good—
Myst
I feel better. I feel fine. (Jumps in back seat) How about one for the road?
Grouper
Come on, Myst.
Myst
It would relax us!
Grouper
I am relaxed! Why are you so nervous?
Myst
I’m not—
Grouper
It’s something!
Myst
(Getting progressively more upset) This is sort of a big commitment, isn’t it? Whether we get married or live together or even spend the summer together…
Grouper
We’re going to spend longer than that—
Myst
I’ve never made a commitment like this before to anybody. It’s not that easy to do—
Grouper
Myst, if the two of us can’t commit to each other, who else could we ever commit to?
Myst
There are so many things that could go wrong!
Grouper
(Screams.) I said you could fuck other guys, didn’t I?
Myst
That’s not it—
Grouper
Your mom can visit anytime she wants—
Myst
I know that—
Grouper
WHAT ELSE THEN?
Myst
We could have a hard time finding a place to live—
Grouper
We’ll find a place. Worse comes to worse, we’ll sleep on the beach—
Myst
(Almost whining.) But that would be so—
Grouper
WE’LL SLEEP IN THE CAR!
Myst
Maybe nobody will hire us. Singing or anything.
Grouper
Somebody will. Besides, I have money, you have money – everybody we know has money.
Myst
You spend so much with all the shit you use—
Grouper
TO PUT UP WITH YOU! (Pause.) We’ll make it. And I could cut down—
Myst
I don’t know if you’ll be able to do that…
Grouper
I swear, Myst. Trust me.
Myst
What if I get real out of control, who’s going to keep an eye on me?
Grouper
I will.
Myst
(More and more upset.) What if I’m sick?
Grouper
I’ll take you to a doctor.
Myst
What if I’m really sick? Are there good doctors there in wintertime?
Grouper
I’LL TAKE YOU TO A HOSPITAL!
Myst
What if I’m pregnant? (Pause.) What if I was? What would you do about that? Get an abortion, right? Christ, abortions are no big deal. My mother has had more than I can count. I’m the only thing that squeezed by—
Grouper
(Quietly.) Are you pregnant?
Myst
I said, “What if”—
Grouper
Myst—
Myst
I just wanted to see your reaction to it. I was making it up.
Grouper
You’re pregnant.
Myst
(Pause.) Yeah. (She looks at him and becomes angry.) I knew you’d react this way. Get all fucking hurt. I knew you’d make a big deal when it’s no big deal. Shit. Sooner or later the odds get you, right? Your God of Math turns the numbers on you—
Grouper
Who’s the father?
Myst
Thanks a lot, Grouper. Count on you, right? Trust you, right? First thing you ask is who it was. YOUR feelings. You’re some guy all right. Tell you what, you sit here in your car, and I’ll go down to the station and have them send up gas and Kleenex—
Grouper
We can have the baby—
Myst
WE’RE not going to have anything! It’s my baby! Fuck; I would have gone for a D & C this week except for graduation; there was so much to do with the packing and parties and everything. Even if I decided to have it I’d put it up for adoption; they’re dying for white babies now, aren’t they? They are. That’s how we can make some quick bucks, right Group? Sell it to the highest bidder: “How much for the grand kid of Snow Angeleeds.”
Grouper
If you keep the baby—
Myst
I’M NOT! (Pause.) Give me one good reason to keep it. Give me one good reason you’d want to see another baby in this world. What would you tell it, Grouper? What would you say is so wonderful about all this that it had to see? What’s so wonderful about me…or you.
Grouper
(Pause.) Then you’ll get the abortion.
Myst
I KNOW I’LL GET IT. (Pause.) It’s just going to be a little hard you know… (Begins to cry.)
Grouper
Myst—(Reaches to her.)
Myst
DON’T TOUCH ME! (Long Pause.) You hate me don’t you?
Grouper
No.
Myst
Hey; I’ll get over it. You can get over anything, right?
Grouper
I don’t know.
Myst
I’m going to France with my mom, Group. It will be just for awhile.
Grouper
(Pause.) Okay.
Myst
I’ll be back. You let me know where you are, all right? I’ll call you every day. Every day I can, anyhow. You go to Seaside, get a place, get a job, check a job, check out some of those bars, maybe—
Grouper
Yeah. I could do that.
Myst
This is so fucking inconvenient, you know? I mean, what a pain in the ass way to ruin a graduation. When I told my mom—
Grouper
She knows?
Myst
(Pause.) Yeah. She’s in the middle of recording that record with Roger, but she cam right out to the phone. She’s wrapping it up next week, it’s as soon as she could. She told me that a week or two wouldn’t matter, though. She said to relax, it’s no big deal.
Grouper
She said that?
Myst
Shit Grouper; she’s right. Half of the girls in our class have had abortions. I’m lucky it’s only my first.
Grouper
Myst. Let me help you. Let me do something for you. If I’m no good for you, I’m no good to anybody.
Myst
You are helping me. You’re helping by saying that.
Grouper
That’s not helping. That’s just talking. (Pause.) I’m not enough, am I?
Myst
I don’t know if anybody’s enough for anybody, Grouper. Some people think they are, for awhile, but sooner or later they’re on their own. Everybody’s on their own.
Grouper
I guess I was just being stupid.
Myst
No you weren’t. You were just dreaming.
Grouper
That’s what I mean.
Myst
I love you, Grouper.
Grouper
I love you too, Myst. (Pause.) That doesn’t sound like anything at all. (Sounds from below: the crackle of fireworks.)
Myst
What’s that?
Grouper
A skyrocket, I think. Didn’t Whorrie Laurie say she was going to have fireworks?
Myst
I think so. Hey; we have great seats for them, don’t we? This is the first time I looked down at fireworks.
Grouper
Sit up here. (They get on the hood.)
Myst
I guess the party’s almost over.
Grouper
It’s pretty late. (Pause.) Are you sorry you missed it?
Myst
Not at all. I had a wonderful night.
Grouper
(Pause.) Myst; do you think that if we were in love for years and years that… things would change?
Myst
What do you mean?
Grouper
Would I mean more to you? Would anything mean more?
Myst
I don’t know. I mean, you look at people… I guess it depends on how stupid you get when you get older, whether things look better of not. I don’t think things change. You can’t stop shit from happening from happening to you; you can’t stop thing hurting you.
Grouper
Yes you can, Myst. You can. (He stares at her; she meets his gaze, then looks away at the sound of another explosion.)
Myst
(Long Pause.) You really see from here, can’t you.
Grouper
Yeah.
Myst
Are you okay?
Grouper
Yeah. Just tired.
Myst
I guess we’d better call it a night.
Grouper
We could never had a better night, do you think, Myst?
Myst
(Meeting his stare.) No. I don’t think we ever could. (They kiss.) Happy graduation.
Grouper
Happy graduation. (He rises.) Let’s go. Give me your hand.
Myst
Can you see?
Grouper
Yeah. Trust me.
Myst
Grouper, are you going to miss Seaside?
Grouper
It could never be as good as I wanted it to be. How about France?
Myst
I’ve been there, No big deal.
Grouper
No?
Myst
No. (Myst puts up her hand; Grouper pulls her to his side.) I love you Chauncey Morris.
Grouper
I love you, Missy Angeleeds. (Pause.) On three. Ready?
Myst
Ready.
Grouper
One—
Myst
Two—(Clutching hands, they fly into the air.)